More Maryland kids are coming to school in pull-ups. Teachers are told to help.

Educators responsible for Anne Arundel County’s youngest learners must help them use the potty if they don’t know how.

A policy that takes effect this fall instructs teachers and staff who work with kids in pre-K and kindergarten to help them put on underwear, diapers and pull-ups; sit on and get off the toilet or changing table; and cleanse afterward if they can’t do it themselves. Some of those students have special needs, while plenty of others do not.

The school board members who adopted the policy say the guidance, while divisive, is necessary to formalize current practice and accommodate the growing number of children coming to school unable to use the bathroom independently. Teachers who oppose it say the responsibility is an undue burden and raises potential health risks.

Though the policy is unusual among Central Maryland school districts, educators and experts say it reflects a post-pandemic shift in parenting norms playing out locally and across the country. And it puts public schools, which can’t turn children away, in the difficult position of asking teachers to step in.

“This one is very frustrating for me,” Superintendent Mark Bedell said at a spring school board meeting at which the policy was debated. “I don’t want to start losing educators because of things that should have been done before entering our schools.”

But that’s what teachers and staff warn may happen.

Although Anne Arundel instructs all teachers and school staff to pitch in, the work of wiping soiled bottoms will likely fall to support staff, said Tammy Cho, a longtime pre-K teaching assistant. This influenced her decision to accept a new position in her school’s library this fall.

Had Cho stayed in the classroom, she said, she would have had substantial new responsibilities with no additional pay. The policy says school staff are responsible for implementing strategies “to move students toward personal care and toileting independence.”

“That became a problem to where I was like, ‘I’m out,’” she added.

Cho said she has noticed more children starting school in recent years who lack foundational skills. It’s not just potty training; some preschoolers also don’t know how to use forks and spoons, how to take the cap off a glue stick, or how to safely cut paper with scissors.

“Kids are coming in needing more and more assistance in developing those skills, and that burden falls upon the school district,” Cho said.

Anne Arundel County Public Schools does not collect data on the number of students who need help in the bathroom. But in a national survey by the EdWeek Research Center, more than half of educators said their students found potty training and independent toilet use more challenging than they had two years ago.

Some school districts around the country are writing curriculum on toileting, Bedell said.

Pediatricians are noticing the shift, too. When Dr. Dan Shapiro started seeing patients in the ’80s, kids were usually potty-trained by the time they turned 2. Today, it’s closer to 3.

Pandemic shutdowns shielded parents and kids from outside expectations, including at school, which may have slowed them down, said Shapiro, whose developmental-behavioral practice is based in Montgomery County. Plus, caregivers are increasingly moving away from the “because I said so” days of old and toward child-led parenting.

Waiting to see when a child is ready to try something new has become a cultural norm, he said.

“To say that we should be soft parents is not to say that we shouldn’t parent at all,” he added. “We want kids to do things that are a little bit hard because we believe in their ability to grow and develop.”

Shapiro said parents should start potty training when kids are between 18 and 24 months old so it can be a “gradual, low-pressure project” — just like with the development of language and social skills. Kids in kindergarten won’t get as much individual attention as they do at home or in smaller preschool classrooms.

The state does not require children to be fully potty-trained to enroll in school. And most Central Maryland school systems don’t have formal potty training policies, though several have issued broad guidance instructing teachers to coordinate with families on children’s progress and to handle accidents.

Carroll County, for example, has no formal policy, but staff “will do whatever needs to be done to meet the needs of the student,” said spokesperson Carey Gaddis. Montgomery County’s toileting policy addresses accidents but stops short of asking teachers to participate in potty training.

In Howard County, more kids are entering public schools wearing pull-ups or not fully potty-trained, said Stephanie Geddie, the district’s coordinator of early childhood programs.

Years ago, accidents were most common around the start of the school year, when students were nervous and adjusting to new routines. Since the pandemic, they have been “ongoing and consistent,” said Geddie, who used to teach kindergarten. Howard County updated its teacher guidance a few years ago to address the rising concern.

Geddie said the district collaborates with parents to tackle the task, establishing a bathroom schedule, telling parents when kids have accidents, and encouraging them to celebrate victories such as three consecutive dry days.

“Home is where it starts,” Geddie said. “Once those routines, practices are put into place, students get on board.”

Unlike in Anne Arundel, Howard teachers don’t change or clean students. If a child has an accident, a teacher may help the child unbutton their pants but otherwise stays on the other side of the bathroom stall, coaching the child through cleaning up and putting on spare clothes. If a child needs hands-on assistance, the school asks a parent to come in.

There is “no attempt nor expectation” that Anne Arundel County teachers become responsible for toilet training students, said district spokesperson Bob Mosier, who emphasized that the spirit of the policy is partnership.

“It is clearly the responsibility of families to best prepare their child for school, including toileting independently,” Mosier said, “but it would be irresponsible of schools and school staffs not to support families and partner with them in that effort.”

Not all families agree, said Kristina Korona, president of the county’s teachers union.

Teachers report that some parents say they gave up on potty training at home because it was too challenging. “They expect that the school system will provide this instruction instead,” Korona wrote in a June letter to Bedell. She also noted that the policy erodes students’ body boundaries because it does not require two adults to be present when toileting assistance is provided.

There are no easy answers.

“Of course, no educator — no person with a heart — wants a child to sit in wet or soiled clothing at school,” she wrote.

Earlier this year, when the board sought public comment on the policy, nearly 50 people weighed in. Their feedback ranged from mild irritation to exasperation, and they questioned how the policy would work in practice.

Some elementary school classrooms in Anne Arundel County have attached bathrooms, but plenty do not, meaning diaper changes would need to take place in a hallway bathroom stall. Very few schools have changing tables, district officials have said. Teachers and staff who wrote to the board said that students who need a change are either asked to lie down on the bathroom floor (on top of a towel) or are wiped while standing.

“Any adult who has had to change a standing child with a bowel movement knows how incredibly difficult this can be to do safely, effectively, and with dignity,” an anonymous early childhood educator wrote to the board.

Although the policy passed unanimously, the district’s elected officials are frustrated, too.

Board member Robert Silkworth called the topic complex. What if dedicated, talented educators simply don’t want to assist children in the bathroom and feel they shouldn’t have to?

His colleague Dawn Pulliam, who is seeking a seat on the County Council, said she understands that many teachers feel the policy does not represent the right approach. Some teachers told her they were uncomfortable, while others said they were worried about liability.

“There are grave concerns in the community,” Pulliam said at an April board meeting.

About the Education Hub

This reporting is part of The Banner’s Education Hub, community-funded journalism that provides parents with resources they need to make decisions about how their children learn. Read more.